You are officially half over today. I guess you were OFFICIALLY over at 12:00 noon yesterday, seeing as you have 31 days to your name, and half of 31 is 15.5 . . . But I was never one to get technical.
Anyway, I'll cut to the chase: why are you the month this year during which I am becoming aware of the hordes of people getting engaged and pregnant?
- That crazy blonde freshman who lived on my floor sophomore year;
- L&N in china;
- My boss's niece;
- The really loud second soprano I sang with for 2 years of college;
- The girl who got mistaken for me in church last year and came to tell me about it;
- The best electric guitar player i've heard play in person;
- The brown-haired musical couple;
- A girl who tried to seduce my junior-high flame (and failed) and her now-husband;
- Another one of my boss's nieces;
- The girl I met 3 weeks ago in Wisconsin who was almost dead with morning sickness.
Now that I think about it, October, it must be nice to hold so much happy news in your weekly arms. I hope the remaining half of your life this year holds even more stories of union, procreation, and love. I'll be sitting in my cubicle trying not to feel a.) too spinster-ish, or b.) too weirded out.
Sincerely,
She.
P.S. Does this mean the next 9 months of my life hold nothing but showers, invitations, announcements, and weddings?
P.P.S. That was a rhetorical question. Don't get smart, October, my goodwill toward you only extends so far.
10 comments:
I think this is a natural result of our phase of life at the moment. If it's any consolation, it doesn't end. Okay, that's not very consoling... but I'm just saying you get married, and people have babies, you have a baby and people are having more, etc. It just keeps on tumbling. I think the key is to just finding contentment in your present state, no matter how people are whirling around you.
PS: Why is anthropomorphism so enjoyable?
no, not very consoling, thanks.
and right, i'm working on the finding contentment no matter what my circumstances thing...i think for most of us, it's a lifelong learning process.
also, this wasn't so much meant to be a "rant" as much as it was just meant to convey a trend i've noticed in a sort of humorous, sarcastic way.
yes, life long. sigh.
guffaw.
you are clever and really funny.
the end.
Ha hAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
No one can slice 'em and dice 'em like you can baby.
LOVE YOU!
And your sharp tongue:)
YOu
KnOW
WhaT
I
Am
taLKing about:)
*smirk*
And for the record: I ain't got no baby.
Hee-til-tee, I'm gonna be right with you on this one! All the babies and weddings freak me right out. I think that had something (subliminally) to do with our timing moving up North; as the only non-prego couple we were basically the outcasts.
I never cease to be bored by other people's small lives...
and this smallness has nothing to do with what is happening or not happening with their life, but rather in their inability to transcend their circumstances for a moment to see the people around them.
re-read my post and wanted to clarify... was meaning to say, I am right there with you...
mme: thanks for receiving my TRUE rant about all of "this." as you can see, nobody's the wiser, apparently. i love being able to say EXACTLY what i want to say, and still hide from some. you, on the other hand, see it all...
plumeinmypocket: ...as you do, my precious (said gollum-style). thanks for your spastic capitalization, smirks, and ebonics. i find it marvelous that there are 2 levels of comprehension in the world...more on this later...
chere umberdove: THANK YOU for your sincere sympathy. sometimes things are meant to be commiserated, even lightly so, and i'm glad you caught the lighthearted exasperation in this post :) know that you have a fellow outcast here in the midwest!
saint: i know exactly what you mean - but i'm glad for the clarification anyway. clarification is pretty much always KEY. and thanks for the reminder. at least the smallness you speak of DOES have a positive attribute: it is always wickedly, entertaining.
please disregard the "," after wickedly...i know none of you think less of me if i make a grammatical error, but i'm a recovering English major, accidental errors such as these must be publicly acknowledged and made right.
*waving my freak flag*
{name that movie reference, anyone?}
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